Blumenthal and Tampons

I was watching Heston Blumenthal this morning. Yes, this morning. There's only so much Sky News one can take. He was making a trifle. The perfect trifle of course.

One of the problems with custard, which is part of a trifle he explained, is that, apparently, it leaves a layer of mucous on ones tongue which makes subsequent mouthfuls taste a bit, well, mucousy, I'm guessing. Ever the perfectionist, Heston was trying to find a recipe 

which alleviated this internationally accepted custard problem. 

And to illustrate the issue, he took a taste of custard then applied the most absorbent artifact on earth  - a tampon of course - to his tongue. At which point the soi-disant experimental chef had a tampon in his mouth complete with string dangling down. Quite a sight.

At first, I thought this was the solution. Rather than devising a method to, say, boil the custard at 75 degrees for four minutes, remove the fat and add some freeze dried mouse droppings, I believed he was proposing we insert a tampon in our mouth between mouthfuls. This would, of course, look stupid and be very expensive but it's all about the flavour isn't it?

But I was wrong. The solution, which I'll spare you (since I can't remember it), was actually even more stupid and expensive. And, of course, hopelessly complicated and impractical.