Non Sequitur

I [1] decided today [2], as a surprise for my kids [3], to cut the hedge in the shape of some lesser known Disney characters.

I had nothing to cut the hedge with so I went to the garden centre. I can never find anything in garden centres. So I said to the fourth assistant (didn't like the look of the first three) I saw:

"Secateurs"?

"Non sequiturs", the cheeky bastard replied.

I stormed out furiously. The hedge would have remain hedge-shaped.

[1] it was Peter Cook in actual fact.

[2] years ago, before he died.

[3] etc