12.5.09

In Which Turdiby Gets Mixed News

Yesterday, the Irish broadcaster Ryan Turdiby, who thinks the Ramones and the Ronettes are the same band but knows a shit-load about the (dead) Kennedys, was given good news and bad news by his employers Radio Telefís Éireann.

He asked for the good news first.

"Congratulations, you have been promoted to host the 'The Late Late Show'", they said.

He was obviously delighted with this news. He'd managed to fight off some incredibly stiff competition, er Gerry Ryan and Miriam O'Callaghan, to host the 'iconic', flagship show.

"Hurrah!!!", he exclaimed. 
Thunderous desk drumming reminiscent of David Letterman circa 1990 
"But what's the bad news?".

"Unfortunately we're taking your Saturday night show off the air. Due to it being, er, very ... well ... what's the word ... shit?", they told him.

"Hurroo", he squeaked.  
Muted desk drumming using only two fingers. One on each hand. The one next to the thumb. 
"But, overall, in the round", he said, "this is, like, good news isn't it?".

"Yes", they told him. "It's very good news indeed Turdiby".

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